Body Switch
by Romanow
Summary: Everything was fully normal the night before. Until she woke up. What happens, when Sakura switch into her fellow Akatsuki members bodies? And they switch into hers? Chaos! Crack-fic. No actually plot, just random Akatsakuness! Rated M for language and others. R&R. SakuraxMulti.
1. The Day After

**Well, this is a new story that i created for the sake of insanity. I wanted to create something original, so this is my version of this. I plan on releasing at LEAST one chapter per month. So i hope i goes. With the life of a boardin school student, I don't have as much time as i wanted to.**

**But well, I will not rabble anymore, so here it begins.**

**Disclaimer:** I only own the story, everything else is credited to Masashi Kishimoto.

* * *

**~Sakura P.O.V~**

The first thing that shot through my head when I woke up, was pain. "Ouch .." I mumbled as I opened my eyes. Light was just not my best friend this morning. I didn't drink that much last night, did I? I remember how Itachi, Kisame and Hidan passed out, but I only got half as much as them. What the hell went wrong? _'Well, fuck it ..'_ I stood up, and then it hit me: This was Itachi's room? I had no idea how I ended up in here, but well, I must find out later. Right now, I had other needs. I made my way to Itachi's bathroom, went in, and sat down. A strange feeling appeared between my legs, and I looked down. My eyes grew wide.

_'Oh. My. Fucking. Horse Killer! '_

**~Normal P.O.V~**

"That was one hell of a night!" Hidan grinned, as the other members groaned. "Shut up, Hidan. Just because you don't get hangovers doesn't mean other people don't either." Kisame almost whispered, as he made his way towards the fridge. "Food.." He mumbled over and over again, searching for something eat-able. Meanwhile Deidara walked in, his face completely grey. "Not fucking you too!" Hidan shouted, as he facepalmed. "Shut up, un.." The blonde groaned, leaning against the kitchen table. As Kisame fished some rotten meat out of the fridge, while making a face, Deidara just couldn't hold his sickness in anymore. He threw his hands over the sink, and started vomiting through them. The other members desperately held a hand over their mouths and noses, to refrain from smelling it, and not also start to puke. "Seriously, brat.." Sasori groaned while he buried his face in his hands. "That's fucking gross!" The Jashinist mumbled loudly as he held a hand for his mouth.  
Sakura walked in, just when Deidara finished puking. "What am I even doing here.." She said, while shaking her head and walked further into the living room. The whole room grew silent.

"What?" She commanded, as she saw the blush on their faces.

"You're, um.. Topless." Kisame said, looking away.

"What?"

"He said you're fucking topless!" Hidan yelled with a smirk on his face.

"..So?" She walked over to the couch and took a seat beside Sasori. "Please do look at me that way, Hidan. I'm not homosexual." Hidan looked desperately at Kisame, who had taken a set next to Hidan after the Deidara-incident, still looking away from Sakura with purple tints on his face.

"Did she just call me fucking gay?!" He yelled out to no one. That made Sakura's face drop. _'Did he just say 'she'?' _She was about the open her mouth, when a booming sound was heard from the stairs. Their heads tilted against the stairs, to see a freaked-out Itachi storming against then, with a wild look on his face. His eyes scanned through the room, an stopped when they landed on Sakura. He raised a shaking finger up and pointed at her. Sakura's brows furrowed and she looked down at herself. A little smirk appeared on her lips, but I soon disappeared again, and become to a shocked face. She raised from her seat and walked towards Itachi. They stood there for a while and right after Hidan had snickered a 'What the hell are they doing?' in, they both blurted out;

"_**Why am I you?!"**_

* * *

**What did you think? Flames are accepted. This is my first story that I ever had puplished, so please be gentle(Lol). Anyways, Read and Review, it's what keeps me writing! **

**Btw., sorry for the sucky grammar. I'm a Danish girl, if that explains the most of it. I still hope this text is understandable, tho. :)**


	2. When everything goes wrong

**Hello, my friends(or I hope so)! New chapter up. My head is just exploding with ideas right now, so I just can't stop writing! I just have so many ideas, that both are funny, serious, relevant and much more! I'm currently with chapter 5, which i soon will release. **

**Btw, I'm sorry that the previous chapter was a little short. I have made this one a little longer, so i hope you guys like it! As always, I'm open for more ideas, so R&R!**

**Please, support my other Akatsaku fanfic 'Sidestep', it would be a great help! Now, shall we begin?**

**Disclaimer: **I only own the story, everything else is credited to Masashi Kishimoto.

* * *

_**Recap:**_

_He raised a shaking finger up and pointed at her. Sakura's brows furrowed and she looked down at herself. A little smirk appeared on her lips, but I soon disappeared again, and become to a shocked face. She raised from her seat and walked towards Itachi. They stood there for a while and right after Hidan had snickered a 'What the hell are they doing?' in, they both blurted out; _

"_**Why am I you?!"**_

* * *

**-Sakura P.O.V-**

I was frozen to my place. Right now, I was staring at _myself_. And my body was staring at _me_. In _Itachi's _body. With Itachi in _my_ body. "What the hell?" The words flew out of my mouth. And as expected, Tobi, the ultimate annoying 'I'm-a-good-boy-and-I-love-peanutbutter-cupcakes-because-I'm-a-good-boy' boy, reacted.

"WAAAAAH! ITACHI IS SWEARING!" Which caused the other members to pace-palm. How in all the flying rainbow elephants in La-la-land, could this be happening. I looked up and down at my body, but my eyes froze at one point. I screamed(A/N: And now, Im getting a very wierd picture in my head of Itachi screaming like a little girl, with his hands in the air). I quickly grapped the shirt I(or Itachi) was wearing, and tossed it over my body's head. _'The idiot was freaking shirtless! In MY body!' _I was just about to scream hell and Armageddon at Itachi, but a maskulin voice cut me off.

"So I consume, that Sakura and Itachi has switched bodies?" Pein appeared in the living room.

"It looks like it. Sakura came down not wearing a top, and _didn't_ mind at all, and Itachi's _squeking_ like a little girl. There can't be no other explanation." Kisame said. Pein turned to me.

"And you were all drinking last night?"

"Yes."

"What were you drinking?"

"I dont remember!"

"Beer?"

"Uhmm.. Yes?"

"Pisang Ambon?"

"Difinitely!"

"Vodka?"

"Uh, don't remind me.."

"Captain Morgan?"

"Uh, I.."

"Sake?"

"..."

"Jack D?"

"Cuba?"

"Malibu?"

"PEIN!"

"What?"

"My head.."

"Oh." Pein finally shut up, and I went over to place myself at the sofa next to Hidan, leaning my head against his shoulder.

"Uh, Sakura." For Christ Sake, Hidan..

"What?" I snapped.

"It's pretty fucking akward that you're doing that i Itachi's body." _'Opps..'_

"Oh, sorry." I switched the weight over to the other side, and closed my eyes. _'This is fucking crazy..' _Okay, I knew that I was used to Deidara with his mouths-on-the-palms hands, Hidan with his Jashinist-creepiness, Itachi with his Sharingan _**'Which I have now, muhahahaaa...'** 'Shut up, Inner', _Kisame with his blue-ness, Zetsu with his 'I'm-both-black-and-white-and-asain-so-what-the-fuck-do-you-want look, Pein with his piercings and Tobi with his.. Tobi-ness. But this seriously made the record.

* * *

**-Time Skip: 2 hours later. Normal P.O.V-**

"Damn, your look like a chick, sleeping in that position, Itachi." Itachi(or should i say Sakura) shot an evil glare at Kisame, who didn't seemto notice, since he looked at the sleeping Sakura(Itachi). Itachi kept on glaring, until Kisame noticed after 3 minutes.

"You can't glare like you used to i Sakura's body. And you can't even use her technique, only she can do that." Kisame laughed.

"So, 'Tachi, have you fucking peeked?" Hidan cut in, and brought a confused face to Itachi(In Sakura's).

"Pardon?"

"Have you fucking looked anywhere? How's her body?" Hidan grinned.

"I would never do that."

"But you have to, when you shower and something like that. I bet that Sakura's getting mad if you don't keep her body clean for her." Kisame said with a wink. A slighty pink tint showed itself on Sakura's face.

"I really don't thi-"

"TOBI WANTS TO GO BOWLING! DOES ANYBODY WANT TO JOIN?" The high-pitched voice broke trough the walls, and soon, a hyper-active Tobi appeared, running straight forward to the sofa in high speed, and with a bowling ball in his hand.

Everything went just like slowmotion, when Tobi's foot slipped on the newly washed floor(Deidara's duty), and he flew forward. Hidan, Kisame, Deidara, Itachi(Sakura) and Sasori's faces turned into pure horror, as they saw the bowling ball release from his hand, made it's way towards the sleeping Sakura. It was heading against..

**_'CLONK!'_**

Sakura's ees shot up, and her face turned into an expression that looked like she had just eat the most sour lemon ever(the guys admit, that they had never seen Itachi's face with that much expression before). She fell onto the floor in pure pain, holding her crotch. Itachi looked at her in pure horror, thinking _'My precious.._'. The boys wrenched their faces in pain, in compassion to him.

"How.. Can.. It.. Hurt.. So.. Much.." Sakura whined, while rolling from side to side.

Itachi sighed, still pitying his poor manhood. "That's how it feels, Sakura." Sakura scrambled herself up from the floor, limped slowly over to him, and without warning, she grapped his(or in fact, her own) boob in an iron grip, and squeezed hard. Itachi almost fell over the sofa in pain.

"St.. Stop it!"Sakura squeezed a little more, before releasing her grip, and looking triumphantly at him. "Now you see, that you men are not the only ones who suffer!"

"Does it fucking hurt that much to get your boob squeezed?" Hidan questioned Itachi, looking at his expression. Itachi grunted.

"It's comparable." He said, while rubbing the sore boob.

"Stop doing that!" The boob's owner complained.

"Why? It's sore."

"But it's mine! It's privacy!"

"Not right now, Pinky." Kisame smugly said. Sakura grunted, and stomped up towards her room.

"SCREW YOU ALL!"

* * *

**Sooo, what did ya' think? Personally, I laughed while writing this. But it's just me.**

**See ya', until next chapter!**


	3. Breakfast and beggins

**I'M SO SOOOOOORRYYYYY!**

**I talked to my friend the other day(Her name in here is AkatsukiTheKings, go check her out!), and I got diagnosed a very dangerous disease called 'Writer's Block'. And furthermore, I just have been in pretty much lack of time, since I had to study for the upcoming exams.. Kami, help me..**

**But in turn, I can give you cookies! You heard right, cookiiieeesss! Sounds good, ne?**

**-IMPORTANT MESSAGE INCOMING!-**

**I would really like to have somebody to read my chapters, before I post them. Just in case, if I have made any grammatical errors, you could fix them. –And I repeat: I'm still a 15 year old(tiny little me) Danish girl, so English is not my first language, so it would be a great help. **

**For my absence(or is it 'lack of absence? Dunno, really-.-'), I will give you guys the opportunity to write the best way to kill me after this, and then, the most creative and bizarre will 'win, and the person can give an idea to what should happen in the next chapter, and I will be dedicated to you.**

**-ANSWERS TO MY REVIEWS-**

**XxChemicalKatxX: **_**My first reviewer, yay! Thank you very much for the kind words. As wished, my chapters are now longer. And I TRY to update more than once in a month!**_

**DiizGiirlJess: **_**I'm so glad you did! I'm really trying to make it as hilarious as possible. Here's a new chapter to drool on. :')**_

**silverwolfigther00:**_** Thank you very much, here's another one.**_

**izza-x23:**_** Thanks. :)**_

**Ano:**_** I will!**_

**Guest:**_** Well, I'm just making a little crack-fic, and trying to make people laugh and enjoy what I do.**_

**Chickie:**_** I'm so glad to hear that! And of course I will!**_

**AkatsukiStalkers-RebelQueens: **_**Neko: Thank you. :) Abby: I'm glad, just trying to make something original.**_

**goldenlucario1: **_**And I'm fudgin' glad you think so! I can't see how you thought that the beginning was lame, but well, completely your decision! Another chapter's up for you. :)**_

**Guest: **_**Haha, thank you very much! As you probably already know, I have written my poor excuse. Please forgive meeeee. :((((**_

**Disclaimer:** I only own the story, everything else is credited to Masashi Kishimoto.

* * *

_**Recap:**_

_"Does it fucking hurt that much to get your boob squeezed?" Hidan questioned Itachi, looking at his expression. Itachi grunted._

_"It's comparable." He said, while rubbing the sore boob._

_"Stop doing that!" The boob's owner complained._

_"Why? It's sore."_

_"But it's mine! It's privacy!"_

_"Not right now, Pinky." Kisame smugly said. Sakura grunted, and stomped up towards her room._

_"SCREW YOU ALL!"_

* * *

**-Normal P.O.V-**

The Akatsuki grunted in annoyance as their little pink haired (or currently black haired) medic were roaming around the house, beating their doors down and while shouting "Wake up now, sleepy heads! The sun is shining and the weather is great! "They shivered by the sound of Itachi's voice, and did not dare open their door in fear of seeing a hyper Itachi running around, trying to wake them up. Alone to see his body express happiness was scary enough . But, the body's original owner had the hardest time. It killed him seeing his own body eat all that candy, make sudden movements, and just generally smile, like he had seen the evening before, after Sakura came over her shock. He was sure that his face would be virtually destroyed by all that facial expression when he would get it back.

Half an hour later, after the Akatsuki felt safe to leave their rooms, they all gathered downstairs in the kitchen. Currently Sakura was making waffles for the boys to eat, which made her fly around the kitchen, finding ingredients. She turned up the volume on the radio, making the boys drop their heads to the beat. And with drop, means really drop.

_**WHAM!**_

"WHAT THE FUCK DEIDARA?!"

"YOUR FAT HEAD WAS IN THE WAY, UN!"

"JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN'T SEE SHIT FOR THAT STUPID PANSY-HAIR!"

"AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE FREAKING PINK EYES!"

"..Is there anything wrong with pink, Deidara?"

"…"

"Haha, you're so fucking screwed, man!"

"Shut up, yeah!"

"I SAID, IS THERE ANYTHING WRONG WITH PINK, DEIDARA?"

"Uhm.. It feels so wrong when it is Itachi's body who's asking that.. Well, no, un?"

"WAS THAT A QUESTION?"

"N.. No! Sorry Sakura-chan, un!"

"FUCKING GOOD! Now, waffles ready!" Sakura smiled happily, while placing the waffles on the table, and put the knife she threatened Deidara with back in the drawer. She was about to get some dishes, but realized that they were missing a member. "Where's Itachi?" She asked out.  
"I think he said something about taking a shower." Sasori replied. A pink tint crossed her face, but ignored it as she sat down. None of the boys realized, tho, as they dug in and began to eat in silence, until-

"Hey! That's my waffle!"

"Now it's mine, fish stick!"

"Very well, then.."

"HEY! GIVE THAT BACK YOU FUCKING BLUE ASS SUSHI!"

"You stole one of mine, I steal one of yours."

"BUT-"

"I think that's pretty fair, don't you think Hidan?"

"HELL NO BITCH! HE STO-"

_**SPLAT**_

"SHUT UP AND EAT THIS INSTEAD!"

"Hehe.. He actually looks better with a waffle on his face, Pinky."

"I should do that more often!"

The rest of the breakfast went silent, only with some few silenced curses from Hidan, who desperately tried to get the sticky waffle off his precious face. Sakura got up to get the dishes, but didn't mind to wash them clean, as she places them in the sink and ran upstairs.

* * *

**-Itachi P.O.V-**

When I could hear the other members leave their rooms, I decided to do so as well. My back was in pain, caused by the weight on my(Or Sakura's) chest, so I decided to take a shower, hoping it would soothe up the sore muscles. I have to admit, that I felt it rather unpleasant, since I was in a woman's body, but I knew how Sakura appreciated cleanliness, so I couldn't see any further problems. I went to my dresser to get a t-shirt, which was like a dress for her, so that should work. I was about to go to the shower when it hit me- Underwear. Well, Sakura should have some in her room. I left my own, and made my way to hers, passing Sasori on the way.

"Sakura is downstairs, if you're looking for her." He told me.

"I already know. I would just go to her room to find some clothes to put on after my shower."

He grinned at me. "Well, then. Have fun, Itachi!" And then, he left.

'_What was that about..?' _I thought to myself as I opened Sakura's door and walked to her dresser. I thought that the first drawer had the biggest chance to be the underwear-drawer, so I opened it, and indeed it was. I could feel some blood run from my nose, so I dried it away before continuing my search. Why did women have so much difficult underwear in general? I searched through it, and found what I wanted. Something nice and red, that not looked too difficult to attach. I tried to close the drawer again, but something blocked it. After a little while, I got the material free. _'..What the heck is that?' _

In my hands was a piece of black fabric, with a small, white and fluffy fur ball attached to it. Hooked onto it was something that looked like white rabbit ears, a pair of black gloves with white fur on the ends, something that looked like fishnet stockings, a couple of neck breaking high heels, and finally, a red collar with a small bell on.  
I furrowed my brows. _'I have to ask Sakura about this later.'_ I stuffed it into the drawer again, and took the underwear. I was about to leave the room, when I thought of something. Since this is Sakura's body, should I not also use her bath, and her soap? I decided to do it, and walked into her bathroom. . I turned on the water, took my clothes off and placed myself under the water. I sighed as I already could feel how the hotness helped the sore muscles. I reached out for the shampoo-

_KNOCK KNOCK_

_SWUUUSSSSHHHHH_

* * *

**-Sakura P.O.V-**

I raised a black eyebrow as I entered my room, and heard sounds of water running from my bathroom. _'Oh no fucking way he didn't..' _I clenched my fist, and tried not to burst the door down with my Chuck Norris-power.

_KNOCK KNOCK_

_SWUUUSSSSHHHHH_

'_What the hell?'_ Horror met my eyes as I entered; My body was lying face down in the bathtub, the shower curtain covering most of the scene, and a shampoo bottle was squeezed in one of my body's slightly trembling hands.

"What the hell, Itachi?" A head popped into view between the shower curtain.

"I take a bath. I thought you would appreciate it. "

" You could at least have asked me first! " He frowned .

"You must excuse me , Sakura, it did not mean to offend you. " I sighed , and told him just to make it complete, WITHOUT peek , and left the bathroom . I placed myself on the bed and buried my face in my hands. ' I really need something to de-stress me .. ' I thought, and let myself fall backward into the soft sheets. ' What can be done, what can be done .. AHA ! Of course ! ' I jumped up from the bed.

"Come down to the kitchen when you are done ! "

" Hn . "

I continued downstairs in a hurry that could rival Choji's when he saw a cheeseburger, and went into the kitchen.

" Has anyone seen Pein ? " Kisame , Sasori and Zetsu looked up from their breakfast, and the first two had a shocked facial expression. Only Zetsu have enough balls to respond.

"He's in his office. Why so fast ? "

"Thanks Zetsi, and you'll find out later!" I giggled, and continued at my neck breaking speed against Pein 's office .

_KNOCK KNO-_

" Come in. " I opened the door and went inside the dark office.

"Pein, can we-"

"No."

"But-"

"I said no, Sakura."

"You didn't even hear what I wanted to say!"

-sigh-

"No, Sakura, we will not adopt a giant pink panda and name it 'Stay', just so you can drive it crazy only with saying 'Come here, Stay. Come here, Stay."

"THAT WASN'T- Hey, that was actually an awesome idea!"

-sigh-

"What did you actually come in here for?"

"Can we go to the beach, Pein? Pleeeaaaseee?" I tried my best to make a puppy face and squeeze my boobs together(it always works), but I realized that I was pretty much in lack of them right now, so I just puppy-faced.

"Please, don't do that in Itachi's body." I started to glare at him, which made him shiver.

"Tsk, fine."

"YAY! You're the best!" I ran over to his disk, pushed him away, and took the microphone out of the top drawer.

"Sakura, No! It's-"

* * *

**-Normal P.O.V-**

_**Sqquuueeeeccchhh**_

"**EVERYONE! IN THE LIVING ROOM, NOW! OR I'LL RAPE YOU!"**

No one moved from their positions.

* * *

**-Hidan P.O.V-**

'_Heh, come at me, babe!'_

"**AND YES- I'M STILL IN ITACHI'S BODY!"**

_**Sqquuueeeeccchhh**_

"Oh hell no!"

* * *

**-Normal P.O.V-**

Everyone rushed to get in the living room, before it was too late(especially the types who normal doesn't give a shit). Five minutes after, a rather happy pinkhette in a raven haired boy's body came in.

"Okay everyone! Time to gather your swimming shorts!" The males shared a look who said 'Has she finally become insane?'

"WE'RE GOING TO THE BEACH!"

"..Oh, and Itachi, my swimming suit is the black one-piece laying in my dresser. There are accessories attached to it."

* * *

He.. He.. He.. Can't wait to write the next chapter. :3


	4. Beaches and Bunnies

**I'm sooooo soory for the long waiting time and this ultra short chapter. i'll make it up, i promise.**

**Disclaimer:** I only own this storye, everything else belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

* * *

"And on to the beach!" Sakura happily exclaimed as jumped into the Akatsuki van. As soon as the other members got in, Pein started the van, and they took off against Konoha beach. Except for two.

"Wait, where's Itachi and Kisame?" Sakura asked no one particularly. Kakuzu decided to answer, turning back.

"They took Itachi's car. They would rather not drive with us, since somebody here likes to give Itachi a headache at every possible chance they could get." Glances was sent to Deidara and Hidan's direction.

"Oh, I see." The pinkhette(or still, blackhette) said as she leaned back in the seat, placed between Hidan and Tobi in the backseats. Kakuzu, Sasori and Deidara were placed in the middle, while Pein drove, beside him sitting Zetsu.

"Wait, what are you gonna do, Sakura?" Deidara asked over his shoulder.

"What do you mean?"

"You have to change, you know. You can't just walk into the ladies area with that appearance, and I don't think that you would like to get into the mens area, unless ou want to peek."

"Don't worry, I've got i all under control." She smirked, while Deidara lifted his only visible eyebrow. "I changed a home."

"Smart one you are." He laughed, and soon, the van was silent again.

Sakura sighed and closed her eyes, in hope of getting a nap before they arrived.

* * *

**-Time Skip: 5 minutes later-**

"So.. Hot.. Tobi.. Melts.."

"I could eat you, if that would make you feel better."

"Eat Kisame instead, Zetsu. Then we would have a thousand years use of blue sushi."

"I would rather not lose any of my minions, Sakura. And I bet Itachi would be sad to lose his partner."

"But Tobi likes sushi!"

"You're annoying, brat."

"Sushi actually sells pretty good.."

"I'M A TRUMPSTA MOTHER FUCKER!"

"Shut up Hidan, un!"

"Make me, Blondie!"

"With pleasure, Whitey, un!"

"..That sucked, Dei-Dei."

"Can you do it better, un?!"

"I would place a gag ball in his mouth, and furthermore tape it together with duct tape."

"..Nice, un."

"THERE'S NO WAY IN FREAKING HELL I WOULD-"

"ALL OF YOU, SILENT!"

"H- Hai, Pein."

* * *

**-Time Skip: 30 minutes later- **

"We're here!" Sakura happily exclaimed, as she jumped over Hidan's lap and out of the boiling van(no air-condition, since Kakuzu found it way too expensive, and the windows stuck, which was caused by Deidara's last experiment with his new C4). She then began to guide the guys over to the best spot, using Kisame to scare away the poeple one the before occupied places. After setting up chairs, placing towels and such, Sakura raised her(or Itachi's) voice.

"OKAY EVERYBODY, LISTEN! We will go in and change now, and meet at THAT spot, in 10 minutes. HURRY!"

* * *

**-Time Skip: 10 minutes later(A/N: Damn, I time-skip a lot!)-**

As the boys was gathered together, Sakura began talking;

"Okay, so we start off with- Wait, where the is hell is Itachi now?!"

"I'm right here. In fact, I can't see how this should be a proper bathing suit." The group turned around, only to see Itachi in Sakura's body, standing in a full playboy suit, with ears, fishnet stocking, collar, gloves, fluffy bunny tail and _everything_.

"I.. I think I'm in heaven, un."

"Fuck yeah."

"Way hotter than ariel.."

"WHERE THE HOLY RAINBOWCOWS IN LALA-LAND DID YOU GET THAT FROM?!" Sakura screamed, wide eyed. Itachi only shrugged.

"You asked me to get the black one-piece in the top drawer, and that there was accessories attached to it. So I guessed it was this one."

"It WASN'T! What I meant, was the black swimming suit with the goggles! Not _that_!" And then, she smacked him(her).

"Whoa.. Why the hell did I feel dizzy right there?" Sakura said, looking up at Itachi. Wait, _up_?! She looked down at herself, not seeing her stomach or feet, only boobs.

"HOLY SHIT, I'M BACK!"

* * *

It's short, I'm soooooorryyyyyyy. The next will be far more longer.


	5. The Biggest and the Baddest

**As promised, a new and longer chapter's up! I'm sorry for my lack of absence, but I promise, I'm back on full time now!**

**So please, enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: **I only own this story, everything else truly belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

* * *

_**Recap:**_

"_You asked me to get the black one-piece in the top drawer, and that there was accessories attached to it. So I guessed it was this one."_

_"It WASN'T! What I meant, was the black swimming suit with the goggles! Not __that__!" And then, she smacked him(her)._

_"Whoa.. Why the hell did I feel dizzy right there?" Sakura said, looking up at Itachi. Wait, __up__?! She looked down at herself, not seeing her stomach or feet, only boobs._

_"HOLY SHIT, I'M BACK!"_

* * *

"I'M BACK! I'M BACK! I'M BACK!" Sakura happily exclaimed, as she began to jump around in circles. The others amused watched the pinkhette in a bunny suit unleash her happiness, only Itachi was standing back, with a confused look crossing his features.

"What's wrong, Itachi? Aren't you pleased to back in your own body?" Pein asked the raven haired male from the sideline.

"Of course. But this whole concept still confuses me." Said male answered in a stern voice. "-But now is not the time. We came here for a break, no need to destroy that." He lifted his gaze to the still jumping around pinkhette, calm expression turned to a rather surprised one as she glomped him.

"'Tachi, I'm back! I'm not caught in a weasel boy's body anymore!" She chirped, and he felt his left eye twitch.

"I'm very glad. Now, I think I need a drink." He announced as he moved over to their spot to sit down, with Kisame on trail.

"..So, does that mean that I can now rape Pinky, without being afraid of really raping Itachi?" Hidan asked Sasori, since the redhead was standing closest to him.

"I guess you can say so."

"FUCK YEAH! HERE I COME, PINKY!"

"Eeeep!" Pein sighed, and got the others to follow him over to Itachi and Kisame, completely ignoring Sakura's screams of help out from the water.

After a while, Sakura finally escaped, and sprinted onto the beach.

"Rape! Rape!" She exclaimed, she jumped over to hide behind Kisame. He looked over his shoulder, while munching some Skittles.

"Hey, why me, Kitten?"

"You're the biggest." His eyes went wide, as he splurted the Skittles out, the others suddenly began to cough.

"Wha.. WHAT?!" In the mean time, Hidan arrived, and was listening with big eyes.

"Come on, it's the truth. You're way more bigger than Hidan and Kakuzu, so you're definitely the best." She simply stated. Hidan went even more wide eyed.

"H-How do you know?"

"It's pretty easy to see." He then began to couch even more, Skittles still flying.

"You're way taller and more built than the rest, so you're the best one to hide behind."

Silence.

"Oh." A huge laughter escaped from Hidan's throat.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA! You fucking thought..! HAHAHAhAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Shut up!" Kisame yelled while pouting, a purple tint crossing his cheeks. Sakura just sat there, a huge imaginable question mark hanging over her pink head.

"What's so funny, Hidan? Are you mad because Kisame is bigger than you?" Hidan's laughter ended.

"There's no way that motherfucker is bigger than me!" He roared, bowing Down to her eye-level.

"But I _know_ he is. So shut the hell up." Sakura claimed, as she attached herself to the blue man's arm.

Hidan pointed like at rapid man at Kisame. "Come _on_! He's freaking _blue_!" He stated, which caused Sakura to squeeze her eyes together at him.

"I know. And blue _is_ my favorite color." More purple tint on the blue. Hidan opened his mouth to retort, but snapped it back together again.

"Whatthefuckingever." He angily muttered, as he went over to sit beside Kakuzu and fetched himself some sake.

* * *

So, the day went on, with bathing, screaming, headaches, fun, beachvolley, raping and everything else in the league of Akatsuki-randomness. After about five hours, they decided to call it a day and take home. Packing their things, they made their way back to the van. Sakura, deciding to sit in the middle this time, made an attempt to jump in next to Deidara, but stopped abruptly when she felt a hand on her ass.

"What the hell, Hidan?!" _Smack._

"Why the fuck- Wait, why the fuck is my voice high-pitched?" Sakura widened her eyes, and looked down to find, that she could actually see feet.

"Oh no no no, don't tell me.." She looked up(only a little, now) and saw herself with a sadistic grin on her face.

"Noooooo! This can't be happening!" She cried while holding hands to her face, as she looked up at the blue sky. "Why, Kami, WHY?!" A giggle stopped her cries, and she yet again looked down, to see her body groping itself.

"HIDAN!" Sakura made a move to punch him again, but her own voice stopped her in her tracks.

"Calm the fuck down. Now, you wouldn't want to harm your own fucking body, right? Besides, there's a fucking family with kids right there, and it wouldn't look good if a man fucking punched his woman." He smirked with a devil's face.

"That's right.. Wait, what? I'm not your woman- I mean, man!" His smirk grew wider.

"Well, you have to fucking be if you have to make sure that I'm not groping your body at every fucking possible i chance i could get."

"I hate you." She stated through gritted teeth.

"Oh, but after this, you're going to fucking love me!" He grinned, as he jumped into the van. Sakura got in after him, mumbling curses under her breath as she sat down, crossing her legs.

"Stop fucking sitting like that! I look like freaking Deidara!" ("Shut up, yeah!") Sakura casted a sideway glance towards her own body, sitting with legs bent wide out in each direction, and leaning back into the seat.

"Then stop sitting like that. You don't have anything between you legs right now, so nothing's stopping you for crossing your legs like a normal female." She snapped, which caused him to grin.

"But I ain't no fucking normal female. I'm originally a dude, remember? If you stop sitting like a fucking gay, I will stop sitting like a slut." Hidan stated.

"Fine." Sakura changed her position, so i know was her who had her legs bent wide out, and leaned back.

"Much better." He grinned, and also changed his position to a more presentable one. As the others began to fill in, Pein turned his head in the driver's seat to cast a look at Sakura(or mainly Hidan)

"So, I presume that you and Hidan have switched bodies, am I right?" She sighed.

"True." Pein began to drive away, but continuing their conversation.

"And how was this caused?"

Sakura knittet her White brows together as she answered. "I don't know. It was after he groped me."

"And after you fucking slapped me." Came Hidan's sideway answer.

"Interesting. So, it's mainly caused by body contact. Did you have any body contact with Itachi before the body switch?" She shook her head.

"i don't think so. Not anymore that we usual have, which is almost nothing at all."

"We will check up on this when we get home." Pein stated, no questions to ask.

"Indeed."

* * *

**A little longer than last time! Next update is up soon.**


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